Sheo-Test “Maintaining Relationship”

Check how well you can cope with crises in the relationship: to prevent quarrels, leaves, cheating and other "pleasures" of the hot (the first four years) period of relationship. Choose one item out of the list as an answer to a question. At the end of the test you will know your scores and your Sheo-level, as well as the right answers to every question together with explanatory comments.

16 questions are waiting for you. Here we go!

(If you are a Sheo-Mo subscriber you will have your results saved.)

Question 1 of 16

1. If you are unhappy about overweight and irritated at your partner what should you first deal with?

Deeper understanding of your life mission

Strengthening sense of self-worth

Reducing anxiety and worry

Better realization of your creative potential

Question 1 of 16

Question 2 of 16

2. If your partner leaves his things all over the place and you quarrel over it the best way to behave is:

to leave him alone and just tidy up after him

to put the question bluntly: “either me or the mess”

to start leaving your things all over the place as well

to spend time on learning him to tidy up, one thing after another

Question 2 of 16

Question 3 of 16

3. It’s an easy question. Choose the most important statement out of the ones below:

quarrels weaken relations because partners lose authority

quarrels weaken relations because they generate the desire to settle accounts

quarrels strengthen relations because they help a couple to let off steam

quarrels strengthen relations because partners become more sincere

Question 3 of 16

Question 4 of 16

4. You live together and you have quarreled. Who should be the first to make up the quarrel?

The one who has cooled down first

The one who is older and more experienced

The one who initiated the quarrel

The one who is guilty

Question 4 of 16

Question 5 of 16

5. What is the right way to split apart for some time (to “cool down” or “check feelings”, for example)?

having said good-bye forever

what rules can be there if you are sick and tired?

having discussed this opportunity at the beginning of relations

no way (you should not split up)

Question 5 of 16

Question 6 of 16

6. What is the right way to behave if your partner is leaving you in hysterics?

Start calling you friends loudly inviting them to while away the lonely night

Grovel at feet, ask for forgiveness, beg to stay

To reasonably ask when you should expect him or her back

To help him or her with packing up and ask not to forget to leave the keys

Question 6 of 16

Question 7 of 16

7. What should be done instead of splitting up calmly and temporary for “to think”?

To sit down and discuss which of the partner’s needs and demands are not satisfied

To wait without doing anything particular

To fall apart forever

To see a specialist

Question 7 of 16

Question 8 of 16

8. Should one try to be back to a partner once left him or her and having understood that it was a mistake?

It is possible but only if a partner asks you to

Definitely yes, by all means

No way

One should give a hint first and look at the reaction

Question 8 of 16

Question 9 of 16

9. How to cope with jealousy?

To practice awareness that your partner is you, his or her actions are yours

To give the partner a counter reason for jealousy

To learn to get distracted and think about something more positive

To watch out for the partner to protect yourself from being hit in the back

Question 9 of 16

Question 10 of 16

10. Will you tell your partner of an accidental sexual infidelity?

Someday maybe

I will if I know he or she cheated on me as well

It will be a secret I’ll take to the grave

I will to apologize and chasten my conscience

Question 10 of 16

Question 11 of 16

11. Your partner has got someone and it is serious. What will you do first?

I will find out what the partner lacks and will try to give it to him

I will address a relationship specialist

I will contact the person my partner has relations with

I will try to support my partner in this situation having made a team with him

Question 11 of 16

Question 12 of 16

12. Well, you have found out that your partner is not just in love with someone else but has got another family. What should you first be concerned with?

Developing skills of inner state management

Gathering moral strength for long struggle

Finding your own source of income

Splitting up with your partner as soon as possible

Question 12 of 16

Question 13 of 16

13. Why unfaithfulness should not be revenged?

Revenge is not a good thing

It will prove the unfaithful partner that he was right

Revenge is never proportionate and provokes counter revenge

Unfaithfulness of one of the partners is a result of both partners work

Question 13 of 16

Question 14 of 16

14. What one should do not to become unfaithful herself or himself?

To give a partner feed-back on what accumulates inside you

To give less reason for attention from outside of the relationship

Nothing can be done, it is a matter of chance

Nothing, because it will never happen to me, I won’t be unfaithful

Question 14 of 16

Question 15 of 16

15. What makes partners close to each other?

children

love

common dream

common fear

Question 15 of 16

Question 16 of 16

16. What is the main question to ask oneself in a crisis situation to keep relations?

Who is guilty?

How have we done this?

Why has it happened?

What do we need it for?

Question 16 of 16

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Once upon a time there lived a girl with two girls inside.

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A Girl’s Tower
February 1, 2016 Sasha Sheo Leave a comment

Aside

You will not be able to build relations with somebody until you build them with yourself. The desire to be crowned can push you off the draught board.

You will not be able to build
February 27, 2017 Anastasia Leave a comment
Before making emotional statements ask yourself what information sources you have, whose worldview you think so competent that you have taken it for granted and are spreading around. What could you really vouch for and on what grounds? Even if it is a personal experience is it possible to say with confidence that this experience under different circumstances and with other people wouldn’t bring a different result? We live in the world of probabilities, not firm facts. Maybe.

Before making emotional statements
February 26, 2017 Anastasia Leave a comment
Your partner will not cease behaving like a child unless you cease behaving like his mother. But you will not, will you? Because when he “grows up” he will get the right to vote and you will have to take it into account and won’t be able to wave it aside. It is much easier now: don’t anger your Mummy, Mummy is tired, live me alone, you can only think of games, get a life, you are a disaster for me.

Your partner will not cease
February 23, 2017 Anastasia Leave a comment
People manipulate each other not from malice, but out of ingenuous belief that the content of other people’s heads does not differ from those of their own one.

People manipulate
February 20, 2017 Anastasia Leave a comment
I believe that there should be some cultural inequality between partners – it allows one of them to refine as a teacher, and the other one – as a pupil. But if this cultural inequality is added with intellectual inequality (one is able to understand what the other one is not) or values inequality (what is important for one is not important for the other) relations will be spoilt and the gap will grow.

I believe that there should be some
February 17, 2017 Anastasia Leave a comment
People lose the senses of proportion and limit in two cases: when everything is allowed and when everything is banned. In the first case a person goes too far, in the second one – his wits end.

Very often it is a mirror pattern: one partner goes mad of impunity, the other one is exhausted with bans – wherever you go you bump into a fence. A girl is tortured by the question: “Why is he allowed everything and why am I allowed nothing?” But she can’t jump over the fence. She is even afraid to approach it.

But once it turns topsy-turvy. All the fences are washed away, everything goes down the drain, revolutions begin and the former relationship bones are being danced on. The one with the rights is ready to drop all these rights if only he can return the former mouse, so speechless and so comfortable. But it is already too late.

Why? Why has it happened so? The mouse has won a mandate for destroying old and reforming life. The mandate is called “Love”. Love is the highest permission. It gives freedom to a slave. Even if not freedom, then St. George’s’day – the opportunity to choose a new lord.

But it was possible not to take the things to the edge if one of the partners hadn’t been blowing hot air so much, and the other one hadn’t been so patient. But for some reason nobody understands it. In any relations – either personal, or business or public ones.

People lose the senses
February 16, 2017 Anastasia Leave a comment

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