Relations are not built up because none of the partners wants to explicitly command or obey, but both manipulate desperately trying to implicitly secure their predominance (and causing mutual aggression, of course). The only possible decision is to voluntarily exchange power, to accept definite roles being aware of own equality and freedom. But, alas, people do not feel equal and free, that is why thinking of obedience, even within a game context, is intolerable for them.